The TAXI Fanzine wishes this upon no one. We feel that all beings deserve their questions to be answered, and so we set out upon a journey to find someone that could accomplish that very task.

Our search took us to every corner of the earth, from Nepal to Brazil, in the deepest valleys and on top of the tallest mountains. We wanted to find a Guru... a guide that could show our visitors the key to their questions. But not just any guru, mind you. Not a fitness guru, or a business guru, or even a spiritual guru. We wanted a Soccer Guru... and what a soccer guru we found!

Our party came across a village deep into the forests of northern Mongolia called Mörön. As we explored this barren town, we witnessed the denizens lined up in front of a small hut. Curious, our group got on line and slowly made our way inside.

Before us was a small man, not but five feet tall, sitting on a pillow. The young man in front of us asked of him, "Oh High Mongoloid, is it legal to score a goal with your hand?" The wise man replied, "Only if you are Diego Maradona, my son". We were amazed. Our turn came and our joy could not be contained. "You are Him! You are who we have searched all over the world for!" "Yes my sons", He replied, "I know why you have come, and I will be more than happy to help you in your cause to enlighten the on-line soccer community".